Can’t Miss Bliss

Jessi + Dan = Perfection

Ever catch the Hill After Show?  I’m not going to lie to you, I dismissed it at first.  I saw the first few moments a number of times and thought it was a bit juvenile… why would you want to recap a show you had just seen?  Seriously?

Oh, was I ever wrong.

The Hills After Show is brilliant.  In large part thanks to it’s two hosts, Jessi and Dan, who aren’t afraid to say what’s on their mind.  And a lot of it is exactly what we all know everyone else is thinking too!

The remixes, the play-by-play commentary complete with on-screen doodles and the many freeze frames… you can’t go wrong.

Highlight:  Tom Cruise made a cameo on tonight’s episode.  Yes, TOM CRUISE.  The Hills just solidified itself as a pop culture phenomenon.

So thank you MTV, for importing this little gem from MTV Canada, our neighbors to the north.  I apoligize for ever doubting your judgement… but I mean would you really blame me?  A Double Shot at Love?  Is that really necessary?  I don’t think I need to answer that.

So until next Monday (Speidi wedding in Mexico! I can not contain my excitement)… keep it real After Show.

Not Again

Move your booty

I was so enjoying not being saturated by Beyonce’s bootylicious booty. Since her marriage to Jay-Z she’s been laying low, out of the spot light and I have been basking in the sun rays. Now she’s back in a movie with Oscar buzz, she’s got a new single out and her upgrade song is on repeat with Direct TV commercials. GRRRR> just in time for the holiday season I have Beyonce adding more stress to my life. Go back to your upper-west side apartments.

She had me at hello.

Oh Britney, where do I begin?

Sunday night was the premier of the Britney Spears documentary, Britney: For the Record.  An account of 60 days in the life of the one and only Miss. Britney Spears.

Britney Spears Changed My Life

I laughed, I cried, I was thankful there were no commercial interruptions to deter from the brilliance that took over the airwaves that night.

Let’s get one thing straight, I was always on Team Britney… rooting for her from the moment I witnessed the phenomenal “Hit Me Baby One More Time” music video on MTV’s TRL, to last year’s marathon of crazy.  I never imagined that the girl who hypnotized every youngster on weekday afternoons wouldn’t become one of the icons of my generation.

And I was right.  She is ever the icon I imagined she would be.  Her doc garnered 3.7 million viewers according to Shelly Palmer.  Quite the feat for a women who a year ago was in the midst of a very public physical and mental break down.

This hour long film gave us all a glimpse into the fanfare and reality that has become her daily routine.  The hype and the chaos would numb any person to the core, and if you did not feel for this girl after that hour was up, you have no soul.

So Britney,  thank you.  Thank you for opening up your life, your love and your inner feelings to the world; for showing us that you are mortal just like the rest of us… that upon becoming a celebrity you do not grow a thicker skin to deal with it all.  Personal struggles do not vanish after you go platinum, and if anything are only multiplied with every flash of a paparazzi’s bulb.

I was never a bigger fan of yours than I am after getting a peak into your busy life.  I wish you all the best my dear.  Stay strong, hold on to the things that matter most to you and always, always, ALWAYS know, I got your back girlfriend.

This ain't no Barnum and Bailey's

So Happy Birthday, good luck with the new album and until next time… keep it real.

R.I.P. TRL

R.I.P. all that's left of music television

I didn’t think I’d ever see the day. The show that defined MTV for my generation is now dead. Probably to be replaced by more bad reality TV reruns like Man and Wife or Sex with Dr. Drew. I guess they weren’t even playing videos any more, just sound bites in between celebrities talking about their latest gross-out comedy.

Is Carson Daily still doing that late night show? Leaving TRL was not a good career choice.

More when I’m less disappointed with the world.

Sass and Class

5 Real Ladies

My new reason to live: The Real Housewives of Atlanta.  Thank you once again Bravo.  You always bring your A game.

I honestly don’t know which housewife I like the best.  Here’s a breakdown of the ‘Hotlanta’ Hot Mamma’s:

Keeps it Real 24/7

Ne Ne tells it like it is and isn’t afraid to speak her mind.  Sure she doesn’t get along with all the ladies all the time (one minute it’s Sheree the next it’s Kim… I can’t keep up!) but at least she keeps it interesting… and entertaining.  Low point: Last week’s episode.  Ne Ne found out the man she always thought was her father, really wasn’t.  High Point:  Calling out Kim on her BS country songs… what are frienemy’s for?

The Next Dolly Parton

Kim, the wanna be country crooner who is dating mystery man Big Poppa.  First off, my birthday is October 4th.  I would love it if you through me a surprise party complete with Louis Vuitton bag.  Second off, how do you get your hair to do whatever it is that it does?  If there is a hole in the ozone over Atlanta we know who to blame.  High Point: Being the mediator between Ne Ne and Sheree.  Low Point: Anytime she tries to sing.  Sorry Kim, I’m not much of a country fan.

Fashionista

Sheree knows how to have a good time and throw an excellent party… just make sure you’re on the guest list.  This aspiring fashion maven is serious about her work.  She’s even gone so far as to request the help of Project Runway Season 3 finalist Mychael Knight (yes… it’s like The Jetson’s meet The Flintston’s for adults).  High Point: She has her own personal shoe shopper.  Low Point:  The “launch” party for her fashion line (um, you need to show the clothes honey.  And real fashion designers can sew on their own so you have no one to blame but yourself).

The Sane One

Lisa, the NFL wife.  Mom to two adorable kids and wife to an amazing man (he made her chicken soup… HOMEMADE chicken soup.  Fellas take note).  She has her own realty business, manages a household and still has enough time to look fabulous.  Gold star.  Low Point: N/A  High Point: Staying away (for the most part) from the dramz the other ladies seem to always bring.

Who?

DeShawn.  Can’t say I know too much about this one.  I feel like she’s never talked about.  DeShawn.  It’s time to get involved.  No, not in another charity or philanthropy organization, in a cat fight.  You need some more camera time girl!  Time to get paid!  High Point:  N/A  Low Point: Kim and Sheree decide to skip out on the BBQ without so much as a phone call!  Sounds like they were asking for trouble.

Even though we are left with only one more episode in season 1, I have high hopes that the next time we see these five lovely ladies all of our fond memories will come rushing back.  In a time when most of us can’t afford to watch late night QVC ( 3 easy payments… who can resist?) it’s nice to have a group of friends to live vicariously through.  Thanks Lisa, Kim, DeShawn, Ne Ne and Sheree for just being, you.  Don’t ever stop… unless the cameras stop rolling.  Then, you can stop if you want.

So until next season Hotlanta Hot Mamma’s, keep it real.

CMT?! Who Knew!

On top of KG’s new obsession with CMT, I have found myself turning it on with some regularity these past weeks. I personally HATE country music and have learned to tune out the commercials in between the new glorious show I have discovered…TRADING SPOUSES (Meet Your New Mommy).I watched this once about three years ago during the infamous ‘God Warrior’ episode. Even non CMTers have seen that. But now look at me OMG. 10 a.m. – noon every weekday morning.I’m horribly ashamed. My favorite to date is when a rich Au Pair recruiter from Salt Lake City gets a tattoo with a poor, over drugged rock n roll family from rural Washington. She then gets the daughter to turn on her family and pink haired, obese mother by giving her a job in Europe. Oh the calamity.

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Hidden Gems

The Name Says it All

I do a lot of channel surfing thanks to my apartment complex offering satellite and not cable (not a personal preference but when given no choice in the matter I will take whatever I can get).  At first I was strongly opposed to such stone age methods of television viewing… yes, I missed my scrolling TV guide and for once missed being a Mediacom customer.  But not anymore.  Because I’ve had to revert back to the old way of doing things I’ve discovered programs I never would have enjoyed before.  Let’s call them my diamonds in the rough.  Case-in-point: My Big Red Neck Wedding on CMT.  No, I am not a country music fan and would never, even for a moment, have found myself enjoying what I’m sure are delightful programs on an even more delightful (yet unnecessary) network.

But Oh. My. Gosh. did I ever underestimate CMT’s power of persuasion.  Ok, maybe I still underestimate them but in a good way (if that’s even remotely possible).  Let me just describe the episode at hand and maybe you will understand why I was unable to turn away:

The couple, George and Amyie I believe, are on their 4th and 3rd marriages respectively.

Amyie took out her wedding dress and bedazzled it.  Not just with stones around the cuffs and neckline.  Oh no.  She glittered in all her glory her husbands name at the bottom in stone.  Bit your tongue Vera Wang.

Guests were invited to the ceremony which took place in the couple’s back yard.  Not unusual.  Guests in the back row sat on George’s car seats which he removed for the occasion.  Unusual.

There was a hot dog eating contest at the reception.  One of the guests, we’ll call her Auntie V, took out her teeth so she could better consume the little weenies.

They ordered pizza from Domino’s.  Hey, at least it got there in 30 minutes.

They rode off into the sunset on a 4-wheeler.

Reality rubbernecking.  I’m coining that phrase right here, right now.  You can quote me on that.  It’s when you find a program so awful you know you shouldn’t watch but can’t turn away.  If there is any show you can think of that would be a better example of this than My Big Redneck Wedding please let me know.  I’m drawing blank.

Until next time CMT, keep it hillbilly real.

Pundits v. Pundits

What really counts as reality TV? Cable news shows in prime time, when their networks aren’t recycling the news cycle, are filled with political and economic pundits proclaiming their own relevance. Post presidential election this is no less true. Thank you newsy.com, a local Columbia online task force for compiling this for our viewing pleasure. Pundit v. pundit. Oh, I think you’re obnoxious Bill O’Reilly Yes I Do!

more about “Pundits v. Pundits“, posted with vodpod

Celebreality has gone too far

Celebreality stars in their own right?

There has been a short but monumental chain of events leading up to this post.

Flavor of Love —-> I Love New York —-> A Real Chance of Love

HOW DID THIS HAPPEN?! Ahmad Givens (Real) and Kamal Givens (Chance)…..weren’t there rumors of Chance getting New York pregnant anyway? Celebreality, you’ve gone too far.

http://blog.vh1.com/2008-10-06/a-real-chance-of-love-meet-the-girls/

Cry Rock of Lovers, Cry.

Besides the fact that our own KG decked herself out as Rock of Love’s Heather for All Hallows’ Eve, neck tat and all (do you think Heather has had that removed or still sports it with pride?), I have to say that Sharon Osbourne’s newest parlay in to reality TV is getting me excited.

I'm watching VH1 tonight

Last week, watching her tell Meghan and that pink haired monster they call Lacy, to F*?@k off was glorious. Too bad she still harbors any kind of thought that keeping them around will help them change. Unlike Charm School #1 where the Flavor of Love girls have never had a positive role models in their lives, the new batch of girls are from upper middle class families, who loved them too much to say no to cocaine and bikini shopping sprees. These girls aren’t going to change. Never. They are just going to do enough faux soul searching to get them to the finals where they can pretend to have had personal growth and possibly win money. Hopefully Sharon will keep calling them on their shit and help the couple of true alkis with their party problems.

But I am excited for tonight’s episode of slightly pathetic camera grabbing attempts…VH1 will be on in my house!