The Name Says it All
I do a lot of channel surfing thanks to my apartment complex offering satellite and not cable (not a personal preference but when given no choice in the matter I will take whatever I can get). At first I was strongly opposed to such stone age methods of television viewing… yes, I missed my scrolling TV guide and for once missed being a Mediacom customer. But not anymore. Because I’ve had to revert back to the old way of doing things I’ve discovered programs I never would have enjoyed before. Let’s call them my diamonds in the rough. Case-in-point: My Big Red Neck Wedding on CMT. No, I am not a country music fan and would never, even for a moment, have found myself enjoying what I’m sure are delightful programs on an even more delightful (yet unnecessary) network.
But Oh. My. Gosh. did I ever underestimate CMT’s power of persuasion. Ok, maybe I still underestimate them but in a good way (if that’s even remotely possible). Let me just describe the episode at hand and maybe you will understand why I was unable to turn away:
The couple, George and Amyie I believe, are on their 4th and 3rd marriages respectively.
Amyie took out her wedding dress and bedazzled it. Not just with stones around the cuffs and neckline. Oh no. She glittered in all her glory her husbands name at the bottom in stone. Bit your tongue Vera Wang.
Guests were invited to the ceremony which took place in the couple’s back yard. Not unusual. Guests in the back row sat on George’s car seats which he removed for the occasion. Unusual.
There was a hot dog eating contest at the reception. One of the guests, we’ll call her Auntie V, took out her teeth so she could better consume the little weenies.
They ordered pizza from Domino’s. Hey, at least it got there in 30 minutes.
They rode off into the sunset on a 4-wheeler.
Reality rubbernecking. I’m coining that phrase right here, right now. You can quote me on that. It’s when you find a program so awful you know you shouldn’t watch but can’t turn away. If there is any show you can think of that would be a better example of this than My Big Redneck Wedding please let me know. I’m drawing blank.
Until next time CMT, keep it hillbilly real.
